Selfish
by GirlquinndreameR
Summary: KaitoAoko [“Did you have any idea…” she spoke slowly, “… of how much I missed you? Of how I still miss you to this day?”] No matter how unfair, the past is the past and can never be retrieved.


Selfish

A Detective Conan/ Magic Kaitou one-shot

Kuroba Kaito and Nakamori Aoko and Hakuba Saguru

* * *

Round tables covered in white cloth were scattered all over the hotel banquet hall. Tiny crystal ball vases were filled with white magnolias and the chandeliers lit the chatty room. Men and women of different ages gathered with a drink in hand, conversing about the happy couple. 

"I'm surprised you let her go, Nakamori-keibu," a man spoke to the soon-to-be father-of-the-bride. "How old is Aoko-chan? Twenty-three?"

"Twenty-one, actually," Ginzo said, taking a sip of his hard scotch. "But she gets scary when she's insistent. Takes after me, I guess."

His companion was laughing.

--

It was late and no one else was in the garden, save the two standing still as statues in the dark gazebo.

Aoko hadn't seen him in two years. His perfect blue eyes, that silly, cocky grin. It was one day after high school when it started and after her first year in college, he ended it.

"Kaito…?"

He never told her why, only that he must deal with something that he thought was done and over. She begged him to not shut her out. _Someday, you'll understand_, he told her. _Don't talk to me like a child!_, she demanded. He only responded with the saddest smile that ever appeared on his face and whispered a _I know. I'm sorry…Bye._

"That's me," he responded back.

--

"So, where is the husband anyway? Off to solve a case?"

"Are you kidding?" Ginzo chuckled. "If that kid detective ditches my daughter for a case, he's gonna get a wallop, courtesy of Nakamori!" and he proudly stuck his thumb in his direction, gesturing to a blond man standing across the room.

--

"What are you doing here?" Aoko found her lips saying before she stopped them.

Another smile, one that didn't reach his eyes, formed on his mouth. "I read the newspaper and saw your little bash. I just… had to see it for myself, I guess," and he sat down at the bench in the gazebo.

She wanted to hit him, slug him with all her might.

--

"Careful, Keibu," he laughed good-heartedly. "Making threats like that about the chief's son?"

"Doesn't matter. She's my little girl and deserves the best," Ginzo grinned proudly.

"Hakuba is a good man though. I don't think you have much to worry about."

"Sure," a frown made its way on Ginzo's face. "So long as he makes Aoko happy, he's an alright kid."

--

"That's it?" Aoko expected more than what she got. "I haven't seen you in two years, Kaito. Two years! And then you just decide to show up because of curiosity? What kind of person are you?"

Kaito's smile disappeared and an eyebrow rose.

"You never gave me an explanation as to why you had to leave!" Something bright, hot and thick rose from her toes all the way to her ears. Anger. Fury. Rage. Pain. It all ran up her limbs in a rush and filled her mind, clouding all thoughts and judgment. "Why are you here!" she reiterated.

Kaito simply shrugged and answered, "I missed you."

Aoko slapped him square across the face.

--

"Nakamori-chan is such a sweet girl," a woman said to the young detective.

"Yes," Saguru smiled. "She is a very sweet child."

--

"Okay, maybe I deserved that," Kaito stood from his seat.

Just then, Aoko launched herself against his torso, weakly pounding her fists against his chest. "You did!" she choked.

The gazebo was secluded, shaded by plants from the moonlight beams, but any idiot would know that there was a broken girl crying against his chest.

"You deserve every sort of torture in the book," Aoko sobbed, "but I wouldn't wish that on you."

As she made her final swing, Kaito wrapped his arms around her, seizing her futile movements. "I wouldn't wish that on me, either."

Aoko couldn't prevent a smile from showing up on her face. It was brief but it was there for one moment. "You're such a jerk."

"I know. I know."

--

"So, Hakuba-chan, how did you two meet?"

"I transferred to Ekota High School and there she was, in the very same class."

--

"You never answered my question, Kaito. Why did you leave?" Aoko was met with silence once more. She took a step back, watching Kaito's face. Was that… pity? It was as if he was struggling to tell her, however, he kept his mouth closed.

"It doesn't matter."

Immediately, he knew it was the wrong thing to say. Her eyes turned to a burning red while her cheeks flamed. " 'It doesn't matter?'" she repeated. "The reason why you left me doesn't matter!"

"It's just--."

"How dare you, Kaito, tell me what does and doesn't! I deserve some sort of explanation!" Aoko stomped her foot, fisting portions of her white dress in her palms. "You left me just like that with no known reason!"

"It was for your own good--."

"Do you have any idea of how wrong you were? Of how unfair? Of how much that hurt?" Aoko's tears fell quickly, feeling her heart deteriorate with every passing tear. "Did you have any idea…" she spoke slowly, "… of how much I missed you? Of how I still miss you to this day?"

--

"Oh, high school sweethearts, is that it?"

A soft smile made its way to his lips. "Something of the sort."

This woman from the precinct didn't know any better. But he wouldn't elaborate any further. Aoko-san didn't want to talk of the past, and that was fine with him.

--

"Come here," Kaito said, wrapping his arms around her. He wrapped her in another embrace, muffling her sobs in his chest. "Shh," he told her softly in her ear. "You never did look good after crying."

She didn't say anything, just relished in the feeling of being in his arms. It was so warm, so familiar… The scent of his shirt, his skin, his soap… everything was still the same: wonderful and fully Kaito.

"I never really had to cry before," Aoko whispered against his collar. When she pulled away, she could see her own reflection in his cobalt eyes. Beautiful eyes that she knew once… that she trusted once but still loved…

"We were friends first, remember?" Kaito said softly, his voice fragile against the silence that surrounded them. "I just want you to be happy."

"Then why are you here?" her whisper's pitch was far softer than she anticipated.

His eyes suddenly widened, revealing the truth before he spoke it. "I… don't know."

She could feel him all around her. His breath fanning her face, his eyes gazing down at her, his warm hands resting on her shoulders… he was right in front of her, but Kaito still felt far away. She moved without thought, giving him a reason as to why he was there.

Aoko launched herself on her toes and kissed his lips.

--

"And how did you ask to marry her?"

"Just a traditional means. The park, fireworks at night… It was quite simple, but effective."

"And also that rock, Hakuba-chan! What a lucky girl!"

Saguru had to smile. "Well, I do try to provide her with what she deserves."

--

It felt as if she never lived without his lips. Aoko felt transported to two years ago, when they were younger, happier and together. Rewind time, bring it all back. This is what she wanted. He is what she really wanted. She craved for more…

Kaito had to pull back, his arms struggling to do so. He could only pry his lips away for a second and groaned, "Dammit, Aoko." Only a breath kept their lips apart as he said, "I can't be sel--."

Aoko hooked her arms around his neck and pulled him down for another kiss.

--

"Where is your charming bride, anyway?"

"She wasn't feeling too well, so she went out for a breather."

--

Aoko's mind was in such a haze. Somewhere within the few minutes of kissing Kaito, they found themselves on the bench he previously occupied. Aoko was straddling his lap tightly, holding him back from any sort of escape. However, she wasn't the only one relishing in this moment, in this secret unexpected rendezvous. She could feel it, the blaze that still burned inside of him. She felt it through his lips as he kissed her and his hands that explored her.

Aoko felt on fire with him. She pleaded for more, whimpered for him to touch her the way he used to. Aoko wanted it all back.

--

"How do your parents feel about her?"

"You said so yourself: Aoko-san is a sweet girl. They adored her. She's an angel, really."

--

Aoko's body involuntarily shuddered when Kaito's hands found their way up her dress. She let out a coarse gasp in his ear, letting him know that his touch still performed striking magic on her. The air around them escalated and heated up; their skin burned with each caress.

"More…" Aoko prayed out loud. "Please…" Flashbacks came to her mind at break neck speed: soft covers, the smell of his newly washed linens, feeling Kaito's body weight over her own… The sexual spell he casted each time since their first never dwindled or wavered. But she missed so much more than that: the boy that gave her roses whenever a frown made its way to her face, the teen that would flip her skirt in cheap amusement, the young man that would jump in fear whenever she showed him anything fish-related, the man that told her he loved her… it wasn't that long ago, was it? She was still that girl. Kaito was still that boy.

"No…" Kaito suddenly choked. Aoko was jolted back to her surroundings, back to the present world. Kaito wrapped his arms around her quickly, burying his face in her collar, hugging her, squeezing her tightly. He took a deep, ragged breath against the bare skin of her neck; she felt a chill running down her spine. No… don't lose it now…

--

"Hey, Hakuba, where is my daughter?"

"She went out for a stroll. Aoko-san needed some air."

"Alright, good," Ginzo stepped closer to the young detective with a stern glint in his eye. "Now see here…"

--

Kaito's shoulders shook as he clutched her tightly in his arms.

"Kaito…?" Aoko gasped, trying to regain composure from her pink daze.

"Your fiancé is waiting for you inside."

The spell shattered. Realization suddenly dawned on her. She was… with Kaito just now… She felt disgusted with herself, guilty, dirty, evil because of what she did, even though she knew it was so very wrong. Saguru had been nothing but a good man to her. Is this how she thanks him: playing with her old lover?

Aoko wanted to give in so badly.

--

"My girl has been hurt. You know this."

Saguru nodded.

"And if you hurt her, make her shed one tear… I'll rip your ribs out one by one. All 24 pieces," Ginzo said with a completely straight face. "I don't care whose son you are because she is my daughter."

"Of course, Nakamori-keibu. I would never mean to make Aoko-san cry. I care for her deeply."

--

The tears found its way to her face again. "Kaito…?"

And when he looked up, she felt completely hollow. It was a smile, the most tragic smile that every graced Kaito's face. All his emotions were there for a few brief seconds. Frustration. Pity. Sorrow. Pain. But worst of all, a sense of acceptance was present as she gazed upon him. "I can't be selfish, Aoko. As much as I want to, I can't. You deserve better than that."

Aoko found herself on her feet, frozen, as she watched Kaito's silhouette blend and disappear within the garden's shadows.

Aoko wanted to be selfish too.

The music continued to play in the ballroom, filling the night sky.

_…fin_

* * *

Author's note: On crap. I made Aoko seem like a slut. That was not my intention. However, no matter what happens: when a girl has more than one man, she's a ho. When a man has more than one woman, he's awesome. I spit on standards. In any case, this is a mix of angst and a quickie. I actually have physical pain whenever I write a non-Kaito/Aoko, so only the Almighty knows why this piece came out. Obviously, I needed to get something out of my system. 


End file.
